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Banana Man
Banana Man is a guy who enjoys bananas quite a bit. Some would say a bit too much. The Slip Up Banana Man first discovered his adoration for the potassium-filled fruit in a restaurant with his girlfriend. Prior to entering the restaurant Banana Man was offered a banana by an elderly gentlemen. This is an ancient Japanese gesture. It is how one kindly tells you that you have a massive doinker. Banana Man was flattered, as his bald-headed yogurt slinger had never received a compliment, not even from his girlfriend. He hastily accepted the gift. After him and his girlfriend were seated a shocking revelation was made--Banana Man's girlfriend was pregnant. Banana Man took a bite of the symbolic fruit offered by the kind old man to ease the tension. At that very moment he was hooked. He could not stop taking bites, and nothing else mattered anymore. The baby, the old man, the size of his tally whacker--none of this held any relevancy in his life--he just needed more bananas. From there things only got worse. Banana Man's girlfriend was beginning to grow irritated by her boyfriend's behavior. He was cleary paying no attention to her. The situation escalated further. Before anybody knew what happened, Banana Man was gaining odd protrusions from his head. Closer observation revealed that they were bananas. He had become bananas. His girlfriend shreaked in horror as her boyfriend voraciously ingested mass quantities of bananas in a truly grotesque manner. Every time he ate one off his face another instantly grew and replaced it. She ran out of the restaurant at breakneck speed, while Banana Man was left to indulge himself in the grandeur of the fantastic fruit of monocarpic flowering plants. After the Split After the incident it goes without saying that Banana Man's girlfriend never wanted anything to do with him ever again. However, this did not deter Banana Man one bit--he had more important duties at hand. Banana Man was not a selfish man, he was actually quite generous. Ever since he discovered the brilliance of bananas he felt that it was his obligation to spread the word. From that day forward Banana Man then saw it as his inherit obligation to spread the joy of bananas throughout the Japanese islands and eventually, the world. Banana Man immediatly put himself under intensive training in order to gain control of his powers. Eventually he became capable of a multitude of remarkable feats, including the ability to expel bananas from his nose and hover with the power of bananas. He also discovered that the bananas he produced were also magical, and gave people banana qualities not unlike him for a short amount of time. "First I will start small.", he thought. With that in mind Banana Man immediatly scheduled a time to meet with the student body of a local elementary school. Things went great. The children adored Banana Man and laughed at each other's funny banana heads. At the end of the day the students were substantially disappointed with Banana Man's departure. Many banana tears were shed that evening. Gaining Appeal It didn't take long for Banana Man to become an absolute celebrity in Japan. Wherever he traveled crowds of people would confront him, begging to taste his magical bananas. Banana Man couldn't have been happier. A Step in the Ripe Direction Soon Banana Man came to the realization that, though he was famous, he didn't have a singly yen to his name. He decided that it'd be best for him to pursue a career. After a few weeks Banana Man found himself with a steady job. He was a very diligent worker, and impressed all his co-workers. His banana powers had grown extensively and he was now capable of dispersing around 20 bananas a second from his hands alone. However, Banana Man's boss, Mr. Koroshimonitotilokimoto was infamous throughout Japan. Nobody in the company had ever seen him smile. Banana Man had an upcoming meeting where he had to pitch an important business prepositon to the short stone-face man. There was no deep, hidden meaning to Banana Man's idea. He simply approached the boss and displayed a holographic image of the corporation's building. Mr. Koroshimonitotilokimoto observed with a serious expression. In a flash, bananas were displayed all over the hologram of the building. The entire company was ecstatic, even Mr. Koroshimonitotilokimoto leaped from his chair and clapped with glee. He loved the idea, and the gargantuan bananas were installed on the building in no time. Banana Man was rightfully credited for the idea and was awarded with a promotion and very generous raise, which he delightfully declined. Banana Man had come to the conclusion that the working world just wasn't for him. He politely quit his job and walked away from the corporation with a big smile on his face, eating a banana. Banana Man now travels the world continuing to spread the joy of bananas. Trivia *He adores Peanut Butter Jelly Time. *His favorite clothing store is Banana Republic. *He once produced props for Mario Kart. *His favorite day of the week is Sunday. Category:All Category:Characters Category:Dudes Category:Humans